My ramblings....

Been thinking about this for a while

I carry my passport with my bible
So I always know where I'm going

posted by Unknown @ 3:30 PM 0 Comments

"Hate" said the Liar.

I choose once again to reject you
For sake of my own
I hate you, I'll say it. I'll yell it and throw it.
But honestly, we stopped believing that along time ago.

posted by Unknown @ 12:47 PM 0 Comments

Oh God

I beg you beg you beg you
Fill me somehow
I've never been so empty before
But so full of salt, I barely need to push before they fall off
I'm on a concrete floor
Bare and cold, not even a breath of air
I know I've felt you before
I am so hungry, I am so thirsty
Be here somehow
I can't function without you

posted by Unknown @ 12:41 PM 1 Comments

A, L dizzle, E, double Xizzle

It's it, I'm wreckless
And I'm losing it quickly
I'm notorious for jumping to a state of mind
And all the stars in my eyes
Are much sooner to be blinding
Than to hold me up solely and make me shine
So I quit, I'm sick of it
I'm tired of crying myself out
Tired of fuming around myself about nothing at all
I can't even function properly when I'm all caught up in whatever crap is going on, nothing at all is blocking my view and I seem to be uncomprehending of the fact that I am selfish and vain and immature, and I keep hoping in the best of times that I've grown up, but really when I come down to the bare truth, all is revealed that I'm no damn thing at all.

posted by Unknown @ 9:55 PM 1 Comments

Uhhhh gmasnbansbirgndc.

Hold your step
The clock disrupts time's fabrication
And you're sending ripples across the pavement

posted by Unknown @ 4:59 PM 2 Comments

Breath

I pray for serenity
Like standing still
In the quiet of falling snow

posted by Unknown @ 12:06 AM 0 Comments

Wow, Big Fat Rant

I'm so done with being just a talking stick
Grabbing me for a lull in the conversation
For the sake of putting in whatever is rolling about in your mind
You've got your finger on my ear for miles
With no hope of ever slowing down
Is it because I'm not controversial enough?
I don't shut you down or say you're stupid enough?
And I'm made to feel bad anytime I have something to say
That goes on for longer than I'm used to
Oh, here I am, a hypocrit again
Well that's not true at all, I'm just taking it back
The right I have to fill this space with more than just your voice

posted by Unknown @ 11:57 PM 0 Comments

Blog and my anniversary. Yiippahh

It's been a year since I started this blog.
I thought I'd commemorate it with a little cheer.
*Hurray*

I thank the Lord for the gift of creativity He has given me.
It brings me such joy, comfort, and release.
I don't know why He has blessed me with this mode of explanation,
So I commit everything that comes out of this mind as simply inspired by Him.
Without a love and relationship with Him, my words taste flat.

I would also like to recognize:

-My father. He pushes me to write, so I do.

-All my dear friends who are also writers in their own way, be it poetry, journaling, reminicing, singing...and the like. I am so very inspired all the time just by reading your blogs. They make me very happy, so keep it up!(not selfish at all...haha). Also for your encouragement and little blogger comments...always a treat.

-Thesaurus.com and cohorts. I more often than not refer to this website to place that word that's just on the tip of my tongue...or to REplace the word, and teach me a brand new beautiful one.


Well that was a riot. Lets spin some noise makers, throw some confetti, and keep it up another year!

posted by Unknown @ 6:37 PM 0 Comments

It doesn't hurt so much here...or here...more right HERE

Pressure points around your eyes
I feel them just to know your rage
When you clench your teeth
You gain a fitful clarity

And when I press my forehead
Against your forehead
I think that's the closest we can get
It's stark enough for intimicy
And distant enough for mystery

So don't think twice about how unclear you are
Don't underestimate the frigidity which you encompass
Your whole being wrapped around the dark infinity within

I always get lost when I walk myself into your eyes
Like a child in a forbidden forest, dark and forsaken
Unwelcoming and cold, I can barely see through the tangled mess

But I walk nonetheless
My body has memorized how to do it
Like the inflation of my lungs it's not something I can control
It moves itself in patterns and within the realms of pre-exsisting constellations
And I often fall easily into those traps you search my face with
You are fiercly inescapable

posted by Unknown @ 3:32 PM 0 Comments

That Rebel Kid

Lets keep in touch as we carry this on
A hurrah for disaster
It's up, up and gone!
Throw it like the hats you never wanted in the first place
This is meaningless and endless
And we like it just the same

So stop in your movements
Hold the freeze, it's cataclysmic!
You'll watch it all go round in staggering proportions
Until you finally face it, that yawning mouth...
Alright for consumption!
It's all P's and Q's from here on out boys
So hold your tongues and straighten that back
You'll always lace tighter to pick up the slack

Oh venture, oh comrade, oh rebel, oh parlay
It's corruption from here on
All down and out

posted by Unknown @ 3:11 PM 1 Comments

Chaos Here

I'll leave it to discussion
but
I think my hand is on your face
and...
I think I may somehow be trying to draw you closer

This is a step in a strange direction

I happen to be incapeable of common interest
Just reaching and stretching and telling time
Oh vast expanse, my hands will reach out and touch the earth's end!
To and fro, I'll wave and wave, oceans move and winds deface
And when I finally sit back down
Quit hills and quiet mounds
Of dirt and sand and rubble and dust
This is the end
Of all your riots
And demands

And I still try to shake you up
This is love, son, this is love!
I live and breath to see your face

But that's all wrong, I know, messed up
Wrong wrong wrong.

So I leave it at that
I am all caught up in you
But I wont wander for you.

posted by Unknown @ 10:25 PM 0 Comments

Manic

It should be known
That I still feel happiness
And on those times,
Though brief, and short lived
I am carefree and fun
All is not lost

posted by Unknown @ 11:05 PM 0 Comments

Know That Feeling?

I was reminded today
Of that feeling you get
After the chance kiss before the goodbye
The final touch before the exhileration of:
"Never see you again"
The catch your breath, no regrets,
This is the end, but you wont forget

posted by Unknown @ 11:02 PM 0 Comments

This Thing

I'm so tired of feeling so tired all the time
Perhaps not consistant, but often, and unawares
And I'll find myself walking the halls cursing everyone and everything
Yearning, and quite regularily doing so, to collapse in a heap of tears and self-deprecation
I know when I'm on the outside I don't understand it down there
I can't fathom darkness or anything in the shadows
But as soon as I'm not looking I've fallen to the bottom of the pit
Crushed and curled in all aforementioned shade

posted by Unknown @ 12:46 PM 0 Comments

Apology to all you who take time out of your life to read my writings

I apologize for my scribblings as of late
They're fake and forcefull and stupid
And I'm not happy about that

posted by Unknown @ 8:56 PM 1 Comments

Night Walk

Serenaded by sickness
On the night the moon fell from the sky
Remembering all went dark
The stars weren't real after all
Just holes in the sheet


And so we stood there for a while
So much further away than we hoped
It was brisk, I think
And the night played on the edges of our eyes
This was alone as we could get
Closed in and claustrophobic
Waiting for a similar night to replay itself
Just wait.

posted by Unknown @ 8:49 PM 0 Comments

Oh Silly Me

Not what I would imagine
This distant love affair
All built up in my head
This girl misses you.

posted by Unknown @ 7:02 PM 0 Comments

Sick

This is a little more graceful than falling apart
I believe
Just slower, and foggier
So much more unclear
But it isn't sharp so quickly
I don't even speak this language any more
It's like a forgotten one, when I was younger
That's the part that hurts my chest
That I can't even sing my insides out
It feels like hair falling out
The blank stairs and cold sinks
The disjointed explanations that have no reason or flow
I shouldn't think so much but my mind wont give up
And I don't think I'll fall further
Because I should pull myself up
But I'm worried that it's not that simple
Or maybe I'm just not clean enough
Good enough, I know that's all garbage
But I don't want to be just a fool
Pulling blindfolds over myself for excuses and placebos
I'm so sorry I'm this way
I don't have anything to tell you
And all this upheaval of words and nonsense
It's the best I can do, I'll keep trying

posted by Unknown @ 9:42 PM 0 Comments

Nothingness

Every mouth you touch
A fatality from the sky
But you can't stop yourself
Because you're in love with this empty rush
And what else should you be
When you're filled with satisfaction for a minute or less
Against a back drop of nothing at all

posted by Unknown @ 6:07 PM 0 Comments

Hum

Finding the road to walk
That will finally round towards you
Could be impossible

posted by Unknown @ 7:14 AM 1 Comments

I Stared At The Sky

I know this is all grey matter
White noise,
Puffs of clouds
That float up above a state of certainty
And I begin to wonder
If it's all just subliminal
If I am stuck beneath the raindrops forever
Or if I am only hearing them
Playing like strings upon the sidewalk

Oh holy expansive sky
I can only stand and stare into your unstable consistancy
Moving and colliding, unsteady and full of furry
I stare for so long that my size is minutely comprehended
A sudden distortion of humility
I am much less than this body
Compaired to you, fitfull sky

posted by Unknown @ 6:47 AM 0 Comments

Reflections Make Noise

Inhales wire themselves around your fragile esophagus
Barely hanging on like desperate wisps of hair
And you can't see the bottom
You only fly over, reflections you could see in the water
Disjointed, it flaps
Like cardboard on a bike spoke
And all may appear simple
But you can't stand the music you hear

posted by Unknown @ 4:02 PM 0 Comments