My ramblings....

The Man in Antarctica

I have now been here for three months and one week.
The sun does not shine, I promise you. The sun does not shine and still the world continues to turn and I wonder how this deep longing was programmed within my body and soul. The longing for even one ray of the vivid star to stray across my vision.

It is passionate within me, like a fury, like a hunger. There are times when I feel wild like a starved wolf, eyes sharp and irrational. yet the thing I desire lays beyond the eternal skyline, and my futile grasps leave me gasping for some sort of rationality to bind my arms and head.
My mind often strays on nearly unstoppable rants into the bottomless depth of my need. For brief lucid moments I can gather this disorderly shrapnel back into myself, compartmentalize, and separate from it. There is one thing I can really compare my plight of sunlight severence to, and this is only a supposition of my imagination, as I've never personally experienced it. That is, the lack of gravity. The solidarity and dependancy we have upon it suddenly gone, our belongings then rise into space and though we reach and strain we are unable to gahther it all back to ourself. This is how I feel, though it is the belongings of my mind that are drifting away. I swim as if in a hopeless dream, barely going anywhere ut pushing to find the destination.

Perhaps you can imagine, my panic and strain sometimes seems insurmountable. I did not imagine this natural time clock of the earth to be so precious and intimately bound to my soul. And yet my days are not so much passed in study and observation as they are simply reminiscing of the days I once sat in broad daylight, and imagining what joy I will again experience when I am reunited with this ancient solar being.
It has become obsessive, I realize, but there is nothing else when it has taken half of my body and soul with the day.

posted by Unknown @ 9:24 PM