My ramblings....

Alexandra Is...

A Yellow Bird

What's so simple in the moonlight, by the morning seems absurd

Quoting, and enthralled by, BrightEyes.

Concerned about all those times she wrote...don't read them. Some were good, most weren't.

Apologizing for her art and feelings. Never mind.

In a rain storm.

Wondering how things happen these days. Is it beauty and music, or love and laughter? Do I push or stall?

Not sure whether this is a poem, or a life exerpt. Fits under "ramblings"

Unabridged and dependent. Concerned and contemlative. Passionate. Independant and unsure. Searching. Visionary. Faithfull. Original and questioning herself.

I was wondering the other day whether any thing I say is truly me. Sometimes I wonder if I'm just putting on a face to keep things pleasent, and I don't realize it til after what I was doing. I try to be honest and then I just want to ask "Do you really think that's who I am? Can you please tell me because I can't?" I want to be real and original and transparent but I don't know if I can actually pull it off. I am so confused about this self-discovery thing. I am even starting to look down on my own outgoing-ness which I shouldn't. I feel like I'm overwhelming. Like I'm Too Much...which is another thing that I look back on after a time of fun and think "wow...was that real? was that genuine? am I over the top?" It scares me because all I want to do is be clear and truthfull in who I am. I guess the truth is am I showing God through myself in what I do and who I choose to be? What is myself? I don't know why I am faced with this question so often but I hope I will understand it soon.

Excited, nervous, intelligent, outrageous, blessed, a sister.

posted by Unknown @ 3:25 PM