My ramblings....

Somebody else

It's late and I've slipped into the dark again
I barely remember how to use my hands to spell out what I mean to say
I feel nervous and embarrassed, but at least I finally feel like there is something inside. Something inside which I can explain. I hate feeling dry and empty.

My music still feels boring. I can't get through two chords without giving up. Today I sang and played together for those two chords and wrote a corresponding line. That's the best I've done in over 8 months. It felt surprising.


I watched something which illuminated fidelity today
I am both longing for and terrified of this in such circumstances


I've been thinking about asking someone, or simply taking a day to dwell on the question of what exactly love is.

I suppose we've been asking that since the creation of the world.

But, I now have come to my own stand still because I am at a loss for how it is clarified. Because it never really stops right? It just keeps growing and expanding and going deeper and deeper, and the moment it stops is its own poison. So how can you ever define love when its only purpose is to exceed the boundaries of definition? And, if I cannot grasp it, how is it that I will ever come to do so?


Here is what I see so far: care, patience, honesty, delight, protection, humility, service, respect, comfort, trust, balance


Problem: I think I am afraid to love
Mystery: Why?

posted by Unknown @ 1:05 AM